Bohemian Ray of Sunshine

I know this year had been very hard on you. There were a lot of things I wanted to apologise for. I have seen that since so long I have been living for others, on other's terms. I'm sorry for pressurizing you to constantly improve without thinking that if it works for you or not. I have always dumped you under heavy load of tasks to complete in one go and I'm sorry for that. I have always pushed you harder everytime to prove your worth and seek validation from others forgetting that you are not at all liable to live up to other's defination of fulfillment and happiness.  It's so damn okay if your defination of socializing, calmness and happiness does not coincide with others. I'm sorry for all the times when I allowed other people to crush your dreams into pieces, I'm sorry for all the times when I let them impose their rules on you, when I didn't stand for you, when I allowed them to burden you, when I blamed you for not being enough by comparing you to...

So I had/ have this friend (better acquaintances) of mine and ofcourse we aren't that close and have never been. She was like one of those students, with big wide mouth making fun of teachers and particularly of everyone. Who would say half way through the sessions that she hasn't even made the notebooks yet and thought that not even flipping through pages of the book, not even before a few hours of the exams was - Cool. She probably had some kind of teleporting gift, you'd find her sitting at the back bench with her laughter echoing and then in a blink she'd be flirting with her girlfriends near the water cooler and that isn't enough because even if you would be filling your bottle next to her, without even eavesdropping you'd know she had chicken nuggets last night and how her boy friend thinks 'how hot she is' and you'd see her strolling, making her way past through basketball boys in the playground and even if the teacher would be just a few inch...